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In This Post You’ll Learn My Porn Name (But Not Much Else)

I just borrowed this meme from LVGurl because I can’t think of anything to write today and I’m hoping this will generate something. Generate, what I don’t know, but it kind of made me laugh and I need a laugh today because I’m cranky. Like really cranky. Like cranky enough to consider ordering a whole cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory then snarfing it down so fast I’ll want to puke. That kind of cranky.

Apparently, all of my alter-egos have sort of an African-American/Latina flair.

1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names):

Marie Joseph (Sounds very demure and sweet)

2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad):

John Walter (Not all that white trash, is it?)

3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 2 letters of your last name, first 4 letters of your first name):

Famaur (pronounced Fah-more)

4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal):

Black Samoyed (Kinda funny/ironic since Samoyeds are white)

5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you live):

Meyers Valencia (technically, I suppose it would be Joan Valencia since my middle name was Joan before I legally made my maiden name my middle name but this sounds cooler. Follow all that?)

6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite alcoholic drink, optionally add “THE” to the beginning):

Red The Dirty Martini (LOVE this. I think I should print T-shirts).

7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name):

Mafa (pronounced Mah-Fah. Which really should be MoFo)

8. GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie):

Chocolate Chocolate Chip (which is kinda funny because I’m the whitest white girl I know, yo)

9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pet’s name, current street name):

Gracie Alejandro

10. PORN NAME: (1st pet, street you grew up on):

Jet San Sebastian (this is actually pretty awesome)

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3 Responses

  1. I can only imagine what the title of your first adult film would be with a porn name like Jet San Sebastian.

  2. AWESOME, let us know when the movie comes out!

  3. AWESOME!

    I love that my rock star name is Moses Silver Aspen. But my Gangsta name is Coffee Oatmeal Raisin…which actually doesn’t sound all that gangsta if you really think about it. YO.

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