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Funkadelic (aka the weirdest, vaguest post I’ve ever written)

I’m a little funkadelic these days. And not in the totally awesome get down with your bad self George Clinton kind of way (someone please tell me you get that reference).

It’s more of a I Need To Make a Big Change And It’s Freaking Me Out To The Point Of Nearly Being Paralyzed kind of way. I’m overwhelmed with the thought of it all. Before anyone freaks out—assuming you’re still coming here because this blog sucks a big pile of crap at the moment (*crickets*)—it has nothing to with my marriage (thank GOD for Bill right now, FYI) or friendships (and thank GOD for Lesley) or any of that stuff. I’m not going through a mid-life crisis and I’m not moving (hopefully, that covers all the possible scenarios).

I have decided that I need to take control of a few things in my life. And when I make up my mind about something I just want to DO IT. I’m impatient as hell. I want what I want when I want it. And I usually want it NOW if not sooner! My impatience practically vibrates through my body, pulses through my blood and buzzes in my head. It’s why I can’t sleep, it’s why my shoulders are shoved up so high they live against my ears, giving me excruciating headaches. It’s why I barely have the focus to even read through a short article on TMZ, why I can’t quiet my head. And, obviously, why I can’t write a blog post.

I know this post is obnoxiously vague and I hate it when other people do this, so I apologize. Hopefully, I’ll be able to tell you more about this soon.

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11 Responses

  1. I totally get that reference. On account of I AM OLD, EVIDENTLY.

    I’ve always admired your ability to make fearless decisions and then stand by them without vacillating back and forth. Change can be such a challenge…but the mere choice to be open to it is more than half the battle so yay you!!!

    But really, that’s how I feel every day: YAY for wonderful YOU. xoxox

    • I LOVE George Clinton. It’s good-time, cheer-your-ass-up music!

      As you know, not ALL of my decisions have worked out so well, but I keep trying—even though I suck at change. I’m the person who watches the news on a certain station and freaks out when Bill changes the channel because “I don’t have a relationship with those people.” heh.

      For me, change is like ripping off a Band-Aid. I feel like I have to move on it before I lose my nerve. So we’ll see… Fingers Crossed.

      • The real victory lies in the effort. Even the times things didn’t work out as you hoped…it doesn’t matter because you took the chance. THAT’S what matters most of all!

        But I do know what you mean about the Band-Aid mentality. I share that! Once something is decided, let’s just do it already! Strike while the iron’s hot! Hurry up before I can change my mind! ETC.

        My fingers are CROSSED.

  2. George Clinton and the P-Funk All Stars. Where P-Funk stands for Parliament Funkadelic. And that’s not an old people thing, FTR. All three of my children can identify (and sing along to) more than a few P-Funk songs. So, I’m keepin’ it alive in da yout’.

    ANYWAY.

    I’m dying to know what this is about. Even without knowing, though, I am the same. freaking. way. I don’t want to wait for things to happen. Once I’ve decided X is the course I’m taking, LET’S MOVE IT, PEOPLE. So yeah. I’m with you.

  3. i totally get the reference too. stood about 2 feet from him on the street in boston. then decided i was too white. not because of him, or p-funk, but because of the couple having sex. standing up. on the dance floor.

    but i digress. making a change? it’s scary and exciting and horrible and wonderful all at the same time. i hope this change is all of the above.

    • A couple having sex on the dance floor? You have to write a post about that!

      Change is exciting and scary and freaks me the heck out. I’m not a big risk taker for the most part, so change can paralyze me, but I’m going to keep my head down and move forward and see what happens.

      I think I’m going to go throw up now!

  4. I LOVE your recent post because THAT is how I feel at the moment too.
    I just planned a trip to the Grand Canyon to do rim-rim-rim for next Oct. and I WANT IT NOW!!!!
    I think this is a healthy distraction for me. The dangling carrot but I think it will be rotten by the time I get to it.

    I’m not sure if this is a mid-life crisis but more of an intervention.

    I LOVE your blog. Thanks.

    • I like that—will the dangling carrot be rotten by the time I get to it? In this situation, that’s a pretty real possibility.

      Your trip sounds exciting. I’ve never been to the Grand Canyon and I’ve always wanted to go. I’m sure it’s going to be as amazing as you hope.

      Thanks for stopping by!

  5. I totally understand where you are coming from in this post. I have been in such a funk and so depressed, but i can’t write about that because my fmaily reads my blog so they’ll all call and ask what’s wrong and how am I feeling, and blah blah blah I just want to vent people!!! But I can’t just ignore it and talk about other things so i haven’t been posting at all, and now I’m getting “where’s your blog” “we’ve missed reading youtr blog” blah blah blah. So annoying. Um, almost as annoying as someone hijacking your comments to vent their own problems. whoops. hope things pick up for you soon
    ps: I get the reference too.
    pps: I am so jealous that you and lesley get to hang out

    • I’m not sure Lesley would think that hanging with me is such a treat, but I’m very lucky to have her in my real life.

      And you aren’t hijacking my blog! It’s nice to know that others are feeling the same way—even if it’s for different reasons. For the most part I put it all out there—for better or for worse—but when it comes to one topic in particular, I’m pretty careful. It’s frustrating because it’s therapeutic to write it out, and one of these days I will.

      And when this is solved, I’m going to blast some “Flashlight!”

  6. Reading this post makes me realize that I’ve been feeling the same. I’ve known it but haven’t been able to put a finger on it (or a keyboard). However, I know what I want to happen and I can’t make it materialize fast enough.

    Very well said, Mo. And the reference isn’t lost on me either.

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